Welcome to the Home of the Dumb Blonde

If it's dumb blondes and celebrities you're looking for then look no further. Blondesville is a protected sanctuary for all those... oh god, another one got it. If you find any stray blondes send them our way.
Village Idiot for 27 May 2017, Gwyneth Paltrow
© 
By MingleMediaTVNetwork (Gwyneth Paltrow) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons
Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth is Open to Being Fucked

Gwyneth revealed that in business she's open to being fucked with, as long as you bring your A game. On the Fast Company panel Gwyneth said "I'm interested in criticism based on fact, not on projections" going on to say "If you want to f**k with me, bring your A game!" Those jade eggs she smuggles in her vagina must be acting like a set of balls. Get your Gwyneth Paltrow lubed jade eggs for $99 while stocks last.

Dumb

Monthly Moron for May

Which one of these Blondes would you want to get Drunk with this Cinco De Mayo?
© 
By The Heart Truth (Amanda Bynes on the Red Carpet) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons
Amanda Bynes
Amanda Bynes
© 
dephisticate [CC BY 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons
Taylor Momsen
Taylor Momsen
 
Kid Rock
Kid Rock

Blonde Tubes

Dumb Blonde Mathematical Calculations

Dumb Blonde Mathematical Calculations


This dumb blonde can perform mathematical calculations at the speed of light.
Stupid
Blonde Presenter at the Beach

Blonde Presenter at the Beach


Blonde Presenter at the Beach, yet some how it doesn't work.
Really Dumb
Amanda Bynes Police Encounter

Amanda Bynes Police Encounter


Amanda Bynes police encounter didn't go down well.
Stupid
More: Blonde Tubes

More Village Idiots

Village Idiot for 20 May 2017, Jennifer Lawrence

Jennifer Won't Apologize for Pole Dancing

Jennifer Lawrence refuses to apologize after a recent video was leaked online. The video shows a drunken Jennifer at a strip club dancing on stage and stripping to her bra while picking up money. Jennifer wrote "Look, nobody wants to be reminded that they tried to dance on a stripper pole by the internet. It was one of my best friend's birthdays and I dropped my paranoia guard for one second to have fun. I'm not going to apologize, I had a BLAST that night." A blondes got to do what a blondes got to do, just let nature take it's course.
Dumb
Village Idiot for 13 May 2017, Paris Hilton

Selfie Starter or Armageddon Instigator?

Pseudo celeb Paris claims that she invented the selfie and admits to her part in destroying mankind. Paris told W Magazine "If a beeper had a camera, I would have taken a selfie with it," going on to say "I think I have a selfie from when I was a little kid, like on a disposable camera". Porn star Paris went on to admit to her crimes against humanity saying "We started a whole new genre of celebrity that no one had seen before" claiming it's now "so easy becoming famous, anybody with a phone can do it." So how do I contact the Hague to get the ball rolling on this one?
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 6 May 2017, Scarlett Johansson

Scarlett Will Take You Down

Scarlett Johansson revealed she has started taking self defense lessons after an incident with a reporter. Scarlett said "I actually started recently taking self-defense classes because, actually, I was giving an interview and the interviewer asked me if I could beat him up in the interview" going on to say "So yeah, I made a promise to myself that I should not just look like I know how to kick ass but actually be able to" Future press junkets are gonna be way more entertaining. Holding journalists in a headlock "Ask a nice question or tap out bitch!"
Stupid
More: Village Idiots

Blonde Celebrity Quotes

"I love body parts, especially hands."
Portia De Rossi
"Everyone is made differently and that's what makes us beautiful and unique. I want girls to look in the mirror and feel confident."
Ashlee Simpson
"I have a white girl booty. I don't have a big butt."
Jessica Simpson
More: Celebrity Quotes

Dumb Blonde Jokes

Q: Why did the platinum blonde go to the jewelery store?
A: To get her hair checked for value.
( Submitted by 'Jarrel' )
Q: What's a Blonde's idea of safe sex?
A: Putting the car in park.
Q: How can you tell if a Blonde has been in your refrigerator?
A: By the lipstick on your cucumbers.
More: Dumb Blonde Jokes