current VILLAGE IDIOT
Britney Spears
12 May 2012
Britney the oxymoron, now with oxy. Brit twit has officially signed up to be a judge on the X-Factor earning $15-16 million. Britney will be joining Simon Cowell and L.A. Reid in the upcoming second season with no word who the fourth judge will be. Is it really fair having Britney judge talent? She barely has any and her judgement skills are questionable at best. Maybe this is all a ploy. First episode I see Britney arriving only to have crazy head shaven Paula Abdul jump out and attack her with an umbrella, or is that the other way round?
current MONTHLY MORON
more BLONDE MOMENTS
Jessica Simpson
5 May 2012 Idiot Status -
Jessica lets it rip. In a much (under) anticipated event, the behemoth formally known as Jessica Simpson has released onto the world an entire herd of... sorry, she gave birth to a single baby girl. In what must be one of the longest gestation periods known in the animal kingdom Miss Simpson now has a new baby girl named Maxwell Drew Johnson. Maybe they should keep her in hospital just in case it's not over. I'm just saying, she could have the clown car of vagina's with a few extra's tucked away somewhere in there.
Scarlett Johansson
28 April 2012 Idiot Status -
Prepare for another international chicken incident. The blondes are taking on buffalo wings again, this time in the form of Scarlett Johansson giving up on her strict diet to fit in her 'Black Widow' suit. Scarlett told Fox411 "Oh my good [I am obsessed] with buffalo chicken wings, I am addicted to them. You will have to roll me down the red carpet next time you see me." I guess the question is - are you a wing or a breast man?
Courtney Love
21 April 2012 Idiot Status -
Courtney, apology number... 214? After going on another twitter rant, this time accusing Dave Grohl of screwing her daughter Frances Bean, Courtney has made a groveling apology via twitter to her daughter. Courtney had claimed Dave wanted Bean as he was "sexually obsessed" with her father, Kurt Cobain. Courtney tweeted "Bean, sorry I believed the gossip.. Mommy loves you" With just a 140 characters at her disposal she seems to screw up an awful lot doesn't she? I think less drugs and internet access would go a lot further to healing the relationship than blaming the gossip mags.
Britney Spears
14 April 2012 Idiot Status -
Britney, the gift that keeps on giving. Britney's dad supposedly asked a court back in January to make her future husband, Jason Trawick, co-conservator. Sources told People magazine "Trawick will only have shared legal control over Spears' general well being - not her finances, according to the source. In general, a conservator can make decisions over a person's food, clothing and medical care. But Spears has plenty of personal freedom and the conservatorship is just a formality" Ka-ching! Introducing K-Fed 2.0 - now with co-conservator powers "Eat ya green's bitch!" The breeding program of endangered panda's has had less set backs and controversy than Britney's love life.
Paris Hilton
7 April 2012 Idiot Status -
Paris forgotten. During an interview with Sunrise pseudo celeb Paris was asked about her fleeting fame which she didn't take kindly too. When asked ""about when you're not famous anymore, what are you going to do?" Paris responded "just wants to be able to have children and have a normal life with my kids" Later Paris' publicist told the show she was not happy being reminded of the obvious and threatened to ban the show from the red carpet at the club opening that night. She's disappearing from the spot light and her publicist wants to ban media from her upcoming event's? Ix nay on the fleeting fame-ay. How dare you imply getting screwed on camera and arrested for drunk driving was all for nothing. How do you think Meryl Streep got to where she is now... sorry? Talent and hard work you say?
celebrity QUOTES
Pamela Anderson
Owen Wilson
Pamela Anderson
More: Celebrity Quotes
dumb BLONDE JOKES
The executive was interviewing a young Blonde for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, "If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?" The Blonde quickly responded, "The living one."
One day a Blonde decides that she need's to make some money so she goes around to the different houses on her block asking them if they needed anything done. At one house a guy answer's and say's "Well you can paint the porch" "OK" answered the Blonde "but how much will you give me?" "How does $50 sound?" said the man. "Ok" said the Blonde and she goes of to get everything she need's. The wife of the guy who gave the Blonde the job was inside and had heard what had happened. "$50 's, I hope she know the porch goes right around the house." said the women. 25 minute's later the Blonde comes and knock's on the door. "Have you finished?" asked the man. "Yes" answered the Blonde "but it was a Ferrari not a Porch."
Q: What did the Blonde get on her A.C.T?
A: Nail polish.
