Celebrity Blonde:
Britney SpearsDate of Birth: 2 December 1981
Place of Birth: USA
Profession: Singer
Quote: "When you're comfortable with someone you love, the silence is the best."
Appearances: 124
Idiot Status:
2 February 2013 Idiot Status -
You're welcome, now run. True to our word, and Jason's, Jason Trawick split up with Britney after she resigned from 'The X-Factor'. TMZ reported the reason Jason dumped Britney was because Britney, believe it or not, wanted more kids and Jason couldn't bring himself to plague the world with more Brit-Twit-alitus. Quick, everybody grab your backup dancers and get them to a safe place, Brit Beast is in heat. If you can't hide your dancer then a single shot to the head is a humane approach too. Everybody knows the Brit Twit likes to console herself with a backup dancer aka get knocked up, after a failed relationship. We simply can not allow either a) another KFed or b) more Britney DNA floating around.
12 January 2013 Idiot Status -
Britney X'd herself from the X-Factor. Knowing show creator Simon Cowell keen to fire Brit Twit, the dim wit beat him to the punch quitting saying she wanted to focus on her music. A source said "They paid all that for her to say 'amazing,' and offer half-claps". Another insider said Simon Cowell "wanted crazy Britney, but he got boring Britney" Well that was $15million wasted. What did they expect? You can't enclose an idiot and expect ratings anymore than you can enclose a wild animal and expect natures fury. Released back into the wilds of the trailer parks I'm sure we'll see her return to her natural ways.
22 December 2012 Idiot Status -
Britney's been bad for Christmas. Rumour has it Jason Trawick is planning on breaking up with Brit twit, but only after she finishes filming the X Factor so Britney doesn't flip out on national TV. Jason apparently has told Britney's family so she has a "support network" when he finally does break the news. To add more entertainment to injury, Jason, who has made a killing being Britney's bitch, wants to stay on as her manager. Well this can only end well. I'm thinking a shaved head and a swastika on her forehead this time round. In fairness he is being a gentleman about it, he is waiting for her to bring in more money and even wants to stay on to manage her money. Clearly he is concerned about her. Money.
10 November 2012 Idiot Status -
Justice needs glasses. The never ending saga between Britney and her ex-manager, Sam Lufti, is, well, over. The process took only 19 days from jury selection to the case being dismissed when Mr. Lufti's attorneys rested their case leaving Britney's team to ask the judge to throw the case out on the grounds not enough evidence had been presented. Seriously? All those unrestricted hours spent with Britney and all he could sustain was 19 days? Come on man. Blondesville has been going for over 10 years with random crap floating around the media about Britney.
27 October 2012 Idiot Status -
Chrome dome protection. In the never ending lawsuit between Britney and her former manager, Sam Lutfi, Britney's infamous shaved head scandal was brought up in court with Sam's lawyer saying Britney shaved her head in an attempt to hide the fact she was on Crystal Meth. Knowing the drugs could be detected with hair samples Britney took the drastic decision to shave her head but at the time Sam told a reporter "I think she was just expressing her independence and her freedom... there's nothing wrong with Britney... She's awesome" Of course there's nothing wrong with her, what sane women doesn't shave of their hair to express their independence and freedom? Sure, normally it's in a more intimate area, but Britney's a trend starter. Shaving your pubes is so '90s. She does the opposite to shake things up. That and Crystal Meth makes you do stupid shit.
26 May 2012 Idiot Status -
I laugh at your $15 million and demand potato salad! Along with a ridiculous pay check Brit Twit also has a list of demands from "six cases of Diet Coke containing 24 cans" to "10 snack size bags of Doritos for her and her team a day, 12 vases of magnolia blossoms in her dressing room, 10 pieces of chicken and four pints of potato salad every week." According to LOOK magazine Britney also requires a beauty team which includes a personal manicurist, a facialist and a massage therapist and a brown paper bag if all else fails. To get her out of her trailer they open the Doritos and sprinkle them in a long line to her seat with the other judges. Sit! Stay! Good girl.
12 May 2012 Idiot Status -
Britney the oxymoron, now with oxy. Brit twit has officially signed up to be a judge on the X-Factor earning $15-16 million. Britney will be joining Simon Cowell and L.A. Reid in the upcoming second season with no word who the fourth judge will be. Is it really fair having Britney judge talent? She barely has any and her judgement skills are questionable at best. Maybe this is all a ploy. First episode I see Britney arriving only to have crazy head shaven Paula Abdul jump out and attack her with an umbrella, or is that the other way round?
14 April 2012 Idiot Status -
Britney, the gift that keeps on giving. Britney's dad supposedly asked a court back in January to make her future husband, Jason Trawick, co-conservator. Sources told People magazine "Trawick will only have shared legal control over Spears' general well being - not her finances, according to the source. In general, a conservator can make decisions over a person's food, clothing and medical care. But Spears has plenty of personal freedom and the conservatorship is just a formality" Ka-ching! Introducing K-Fed 2.0 - now with co-conservator powers "Eat ya green's bitch!" The breeding program of endangered panda's has had less set backs and controversy than Britney's love life.
28 January 2012 Idiot Status -
Early wedding gift. You're free! Brit Twits dad, Jamie Spears, has asked a judge to end his conservatorship over his
"Will you, Judge, declare my daughter legally competent, from this day forth? I do."
"And do you, Britney, promise to avoid sharp and shiny objects? I do"
"I know pronounce you legal tender for your new husband to cash in."
21 January 2012 Idiot Status -
Spank me baby one more time. Ex-babysitter, Fernando Flores, claims to have a million dollar book deal which is said to reveal Britney's sexual antic's while on tour. Flores says "Britney has a huge sexual appetite..." going on to say "I heard stories of threesomes, orgies, girls making out - things that would make your hair stand on end" This guy is really milking the whole sexual harassment thing isn't he? This sounds more like a script from the American Pie franchise "This one time
