2013VILLAGE IDIOTS
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4 x
Madonna
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3 x
Jessica Simpson
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3 x
Lady Gaga
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2 x
Taylor Swift
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2 x
Britney Spears
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2 x
Gwyneth Paltrow
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1 x
Reese Witherspoon
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1 x
Tara Reid
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1 x
Sarah J Parker
top 10 VILLAGE IDIOTS
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104 x
Britney Spears
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81 x
Paris Hilton
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63 x
Madonna
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58 x
Jessica Simpson
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48 x
Christina Aguilera
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39 x
Pamela Anderson
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26 x
Justin Timberlake
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23 x
Cameron Diaz
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22 x
Gwyneth Paltrow
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19 x
Eminem
more BLONDE MOMENTS
Insane in the membrane, insane, got no brain. In an interview with British magazine Red just days before her infamous arrest, Reese said she felt that her third child was stealing her brain. Reese said "Ever since I had the baby, I can't remember anything, Seriously, this child stole my brain" It all makes sense now, she wasn't using the infamous celebrity "Do you know who I am?" line, she genuinely didn't know who she was.
18 May 2013
Gwyneth Paltrow
11 May 2013 Idiot Status -
So bored, so terribly bored. Miss Paltrow has vowed to never attend another Met Ball ever again complaining about, well, random shit. Gwyneth said "I'm never going again. It was so un-fun. It was boiling. It was too crowded. I did not enjoy it at all" Well I'm sure her majesty will be missed. I can't imagine the pain and suffering she endured pitching up and standing around essentially doing nothing while wearing expensive clothes and jewelry. I wonder if Amnesty International would be interested in helping?
Tara Reid
4 May 2013 Idiot Status -
Give me stuff, I'm famous. Miss Reid was thrown out of a store after demanding she be given discounts because she's "famous" Tara had to be escorted out of 'AllSaints' by security after she started screaming and berating staff when they refused to give her discounts. A rep for Miss Reid said "Tara gets a huge discount with AllSaints in the UK and Paris because she's a walking billboard for them" "Walking Billboard"? She must get tons of free stuff when she goes to the circus thanks to her plastic surgery. Who am I kidding, no one at the circus knows who she is, even circus freaks have a hard time stomaching her appearance.
Reese Witherspoon
27 April 2013 Idiot Status -
Can someone please help identify this women, she doesn't know who she is. After her husband was pulled over while being seen weaving down the road, Reese Witherspoon pulled the celebrity go to line "Do you know who I am?" on a not so amused officer. According to the report the exact wording to the state trooper was "Do you know my name? You're about to find out who I am. You're about to be on national news" Miss Witherspoon was promptly arrested for "disorderly conduct" after she refused to stay in the car while her husband was given a field sobriety test. I guess she doesn't remember much from her legally blonde days. "I feel comfortable using legal jargon in everyday life... I object."
Jessica Simpson
20 April 2013 Idiot Status -
Finally, what she's always wanted, a baby... boy. Jessica toasted her unborn son at a Tom Sawyer-themed baby shower telling people "I'm so excited to have a son... He got all these cute vintage cars and I got a lot of little leather jackets I can't wait to try out!" Jessica went on to say "This pregnancy I'm active, I've only gained half of what I gained in my first pregnancy." So she's only gained "half" the weight, that seems reasonable, I can't imagine the fried chicken industry has had time to regroup from the first pregnancy. Well at least she'll have a man in her life, one she doesn't have to pay to stick around. Wait, pocket money, damn. Happiness denied, again.
Madonna
13 April 2013 Idiot Status -
Out of Africa. Madonna, is now annoying the President of Malawi expecting special treatment and making ludicrous claims of support. Madonna had requested special treatment during her last visit which the Malawi government responded "Such treatment, even if she deserved it, is discretionary not obligatory," There are also disputes over Madonna's promises to build new schools with the government asking "Where are the 10 schools she has built? She is just building school blocks at already existing schools. In some cases she just renovated an already existing block" Looks like she got all she could out of that two for one sale when she adopted her kids. I guess it's off to find another poor African nation to exploit, I mean, help.
Sarah Jessica Parker
6 April 2013 Idiot Status -
Sarah Jessica has a bone to pick, an extra one. After years of wearing high heel's it seems Miss Parker has done serious damage to her feet. After twisting her ankle while wearing heels on the set of "I Don't Know How She Does It" she visited a foot doctor who told her "Your foot does things it shouldn't be able to do. That bone there... You've created that bone. It doesn't belong there." Sarah blames "cheap" shoes with "plastic bottoms" saying "It's sad, because my feet took me all over the world, but eventually they were like, 'You know what, we are really tired, can you just stop and don't put cheap shoes on us?'" I didn't know they made shoes with plastic bottom's for adults. No need for the long face, I'm sure your hooves will be alright for the next derby.
Madonna
30 March 2013 Idiot Status -
Dress up like a little boy, that'll solve the problem. Madonna addressed the crowd at the GLAAD Media Awards in New York City wearing the traditional uniform of the Boy Scouts to protest the ban of gay members from the Boy Scouts of America. "I think that's fucked up" she said on stage "I can build a fire. I know how to pitch a tent. I have a very good sense of direction. I can rescue kittens from trees." I wonder if she'll have to register when she moves into a new neighbourhood? Not sure her thought process makes sense. Let's solve racism, everyone put your pillow cases over your head then they'll take us seriously.
Taylor Swift
23 March 2013 Idiot Status -
Taylor Swift likes her fans like she likes her men, in limited doses. A heap of Taylor's fan mail was found by a local news reporter dumped in the trash at the Hendersonville strip mall. Taylor Swift's people sprung into action and explained that Swift's fan mail is delivered to her management office where it is opened, read, and recycled. Swift's spokesperson went on to say "The only explanation for any letters being unopened would be that a small batch of mail that was supposed to be delivered to Taylor was accidentally put with letters headed for the recycling center." What people don't know is that Taylor is a huge green freak, she recycles almost everything. Even her past relationships are recycled into songs. And tree hugging? Tree's practically need a restraining order, much like her ex-boyfriends.
Lady Gaga
16 March 2013 Idiot Status -
They see me rollin', they hatin'. Recovering from her recent hip surgery, Lady Gaga now gets around in a 24k gold wheelchair made by designer Ken Borochov. The one-of-a-kind vintage-inspired chair comes with a black tufted calf leather seat, removable canopy, padded leg rest and even gold plates. Borochov said "I was really honored to get the call to build the wheelchair for Lady Gaga and after she approved some sketches I started building it straight away" Borochov went on to say "We used 1.5 ounces of pure gold for the chair... I wanted it to be a mix between a chariot and a hot rod." From Lady Gaga to Queen Gaga, throne and all.
