Dumb Blonde Jokes, Legally Blonde - Page 2

A state trooper pulls a Blonde in a sports car over for speeding. While he is trying to explain to her what and where her driver's license is. "You know, that little card in your wallet that has that picture of you on it ?" he has come to the decision that she is a pretty hot babe. Finally, after she gives him her driver's license, he asks for registration. Getting another blank Blonde look from her, he explains, "It's that little piece of paper with you get with your car and you keep it in the glove compartment." Excited "Ah," she says as she bends over to get it. While she is tearing through the glove compartment, the officer unzips his pants and pulls his 'member' out. Excited that she had found her registration, she turns around and looks up. A look of dismay crosses her face and she says, "Oh, no! Not another breathalyzer test!"
Q: What's the difference between a Blonde having her period and a terrorist?
A: You can negotiate with a terrorist.
Q: What do you do if a Blonde throw's a pin at you?
A: Run! She's got the grenade in her mouth.
Q: What did the Blonde say when asked if she'd ever been picked up by 'The fuzz'?
A: No, but I've been swung around by the tits.
Q: What's the difference between a Blonde and a government bond?
A: The bond matures eventually.
Q: What did the Blonde yell during the emergency?
A: What's the number for 911?
Q: Did you hear about the Blonde that robbed a bank?
A: She tied up the safe and blew the guard.
This Weeks Village Idiot
What did Cameron Diaz do to become this weeks celebrity dumb blonde?

Tell Me

Q: When is it legal to shoot a Blonde in the head?
A: When you have a tire pump to re-inflate it.
A Blonde comes home one day to find that she had been burgled and so she phone's the police. The first to arrive at the scene was a member of the K9 unit. Just then the Blonde comes out slap's her hand to her forehead and say's "My house has just been robbed and now they send me a blind policeman."
One day a Blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead were caught behind enemy line's and where sentenced to death by the a firing squad. The leader yelled "READY ... AIM ..." and just then the Redhead yelled "Tornado!" and when they all turned around to look she ran away. So the leader started again "READY ... AIM ..." just then the Brunette yelled "Flood!" and ran away when they turned away to look. Next was the Blonde, and the leader started again "READY ... AIM ..." seeing the pattern the Blonde yelled out "Fire!"
One day a Blonde buy's a home-made still for brewing liquor and was outraged when a surprise raid resulted in him being arrested. The judge explained that although they found no liquor they found the apparatus for brewing it and that was enough evidence. "You might as well convict me of rape then" yelled the Blonde. The judge explained that there was no evidence that he had raped anyone. "Yes" said the Blonde "but I've got the apparatus."
A Blonde and a Brunette are late for work and so the Brunette, who is driving, tells the Blonde to look out the back window to see if the cop's where following them while they speed to work. "Do you see the cop's yet?" asked the Brunette. "Yes" said the Blonde. "Are they close?" asked the Brunette. "Yes" said the Blonde. "Are they going to pull us over?" asked the Brunette. "I don't know" said the Blonde. "Well are their light's on?" asked the Brunette. The Blonde replies "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes ...."