Village Idiot for 19 Sep 2009, Jessica Simpson
© 
By Mike Kaplan (DefenseImagery) [Public domain], via Wikimedia Commons
Jessica Simpson as the Village Idiot

Bitch Bites the Dust

The search for Miss Simpson's beloved lesbian pooch, Daisy, has been called off by animal group FindToto.com after the Malti-Poo was snatched by a coyote earlier this week. Despite helpers calling it quits Jessica is determined to carry on saying "Still holding out hope despite the assholes that say is it a dumb thing to do. Daisy is my baby...why would I stop searching? I'm a mom." This is a sad story that will either be made into a movie about a poor retarded person losing their beloved pooch or one dogs desire to escape it's deranged captor. Either way I smell an Oscar, no sorry, I just stepped in some Daisy. Damn coyote's.

Really Stupid

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