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Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth Paltrow

28 September 1972, USA

"I'm really fucking good at my job, and people who are interesting and good know that. That's all that matters."
Stupid x 65

Gwyneth Paltrow Gossip and News - Page 5

Village Idiot for 29 Mar 2014, Gwyneth Paltrow

Let the Uncoupling Commence

Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin are going through "Conscious Uncoupling" which to everybody else simply means they're separating. Gwyneth used her life style site goop.com to make the announcement stating they will "always will be a family, and in many ways we are closer than we have ever been" When approached for his comments on the situation Chris simply yelled "Pizza! I get to eat fucking pizza! Fries, burgers, donuts, anything and everything. I feel alive!" and ran off down the road.
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 9 Nov 2013, Gwyneth Paltrow

Oh the humanity Vanity.

Miss Paltrow wasn't too impressed after an article was written for Vanity Fair about her supposed extra martial affair with Miami business man Jeff Soffer. Gwyneth has fought back getting her A-list celebrity friends to boycott any interviews with Vanity Fair. Vanity Fair's Editor-in-Chief, Graydon Carter, has responded saying "We started a story on her. We have a very good writer and it'll run," he said. "Well, she sort of forced my hand." Worst. Mean Girls. Ever. Don't run the story no matter how much free publicity I create with my bizarre behaviour. Respect my wishes, damn you. Respect them.
Village Idiot for 21 Sep 2013, Gwyneth Paltrow

Hair Today, on the Radio Tomorrow

After getting drunk while promoting Iron Man 3, Miss Paltrow phoned an Australian radio station to talk about shaving her bush. On the Ellen Show Miss Paltrow elaborated saying "You know normally I don't read stuff at all but apparently this was in like a lot of newspapers," Gwyneth began to explain. "My brother-in-law, I knew it had permeated when my brother-in-law said to me like, 'I hope you're not going to bring back big bush.' Thanks, Al. Thanks for your support." "Well, let's know that you're not doing that," Ellen replied. "Let's not say I am and let's not say I'm not," Paltrow said. I'm not sure why she was shaving but she'll always be a true blonde in our eyes.
Really Dumb
Village Idiot for 11 May 2013, Gwyneth Paltrow

So Bored, so Terribly Bored

Miss Paltrow has vowed to never attend another Met Ball ever again complaining about, well, random shit. Gwyneth said "I'm never going again. It was so un-fun. It was boiling. It was too crowded. I did not enjoy it at all" Well I'm sure her majesty will be missed. I can't imagine the pain and suffering she endured pitching up and standing around essentially doing nothing while wearing expensive clothes and jewelry. I wonder if Amnesty International would be interested in helping?
Village Idiot for 2 Mar 2013, Gwyneth Paltrow

Just Hanging Around

Always keen to try a new diet or exercise fad Gwyneth told of her experience in an AntiGravity Hammocks, as opposed to those pesky gravity hammocks? We spent an afternoon in Richard Holroyd's intimate studio that houses four AntiGravity Hammocks - basically a hammock made of silk that you can lie, hang, stretch in and more. At first, we just got used to being in the swing - part of what makes it so special is the sense of suspension. Then Richard showed us several moves with the hammock. In comparison to other yoga classes, the moves felt constructive without feeling like a chore. And that officer is how we found the body. Just hanging there. I'm pretty sure all that blood rushing to her brain isn't helping as much as she thinks it is.
Village Idiot for 9 Jun 2012, Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyn-dog from da Hood!

One time Miss Shakespeare, now full time gansta, Gwyneth tweeted a pic of herself with rapper "The Dream" and tagged the photo "Ni**as in paris for real". Needless to say pasty white chicks don't get very far with such language and a swarm of controversy has raged over her racist tweet. Bitch has balls. What's a white girl to do when the attentions not on her? To be fair I thought it was just some free publicity for fellow blonde Paris Hilton's newly released follow up to her only successful endeavour.
Village Idiot for 24 Mar 2012, Gwyneth Paltrow

Skinny Smack Down

Gwyneth didn't make any friends while jogging on the beach when she made a snide comment about Kate Moss eating some crisps. Kate supposedly asked Gwyneth why she was jogging to which Miss Shakespeare responded "So I don't look like you when I get old" Needless to say Kate wasn't too impressed throwing the bag of crisps at her and shouting "Why don't you eat some fucking carbs!" And in this corner weighing in at... is that a negative number? What about that corner? Get out. Seriously? Why do you think she was jogging in the first place? She's already had her peeled grape for the day, those grams aren't going to shed themselves.
Really Dumb
Village Idiot for 4 Jun 2011, Gwyneth Paltrow

Too Posh to Plead

Miss Paltrow is kicking herself after investing in a private club in Dover Street, London, which she hoped to persuade famous friends to join. Unfortunately for poor Paltrow non of her celeb friends were willing to pay the initial £1,000 membership fee with a source saying "Gwyneth contacted all her friends and thought they'd sign up." Sign up now and you'll get to pay an excessive amount to hang out with virtually no famous people. But wait, there's more. If you sign up in the next decade you also get a signed copy of Gwyneth's debut album she burnt on her very own computer.
Really Dumb
Village Idiot for 1 Jan 2011, Gwyneth Paltrow

It's like the blind leading the blind

In her new movie "Country Strong" Gwyneth Paltrow's character is supposedly based on the downward spiral of Britney Spears. The writer-director Shana Feste said "That's where this movie came from. I mean, I was seeing what was happening in the media to Britney Spears," And from the media publicity she came up with a story of a drug addict? Sounds about right. Book now to see Gwyneth in a Frappuccino induced daze blowing a Cinnamon Roll for her next fix at a cinema near you.
Village Idiot for 25 Jul 2009, Gwyneth Paltrow

Blonde box Office Battle

Miss Paltrow is pissed after being snubbed by movie producers in favour of Scarlett Johansson on movie posters for 'Iron Man 2'. A source said "Gwyneth was afraid she'd be upstaged by Scarlett and not being in the campaign was the final straw. She is furious she's been left out." So Gwyneth's surprised that she's lost face time to a giant pair of breasts cavorting on screen - How long has she been in Hollywood? Maybe it's time she fights back Hollywood style, nothing makes headlines like celebs in rehab... except maybe giant breast's.