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Madonna Gossip and News - Page 5
Village Idiot for 4 Feb 2012, Madonna
Money Mad Madonna
The material girl won't let a poor mans recession inhibit her ability to grow her collection of adopted kids. No sir, Madonna will continue touring squeezing every last drop of money from her fans claiming to have raked in $408 million from her last tour. Madonna defended her delusions saying "People spend $300 on crazy things all the time, things like handbags. So work all year, scrape the money together, and come to my show. I'm worth it." So you can either buy a bag or watch an old bag gyrate on stage for an hour? No wonder we're in a recession.
Village Idiot for 10 Sep 2011, Madonna
After receiving Hydrangea's at a press conference and muttering how she "loathed" them, Madonna's publicity machine has kicked in to defend her bitchy behaviour. CNN reports "She's entitled to like any flower she wants and she didn't want to hurt the feeling of the hydrangeas of the world," the rep said in a short statement. "No disrespect to the hydrangeas lovers of the world but she prefers different types of flowers." Wait, why are CNN getting involved in this, is there no war/famine/natural disaster happening somewhere? Is this really what the news agency's are focused on, flower phobia's? Breaking news, disdain for daisy's at an all time high, ivy invasion continues unabated. Tonight at 21:00.
Village Idiot for 27 Nov 2010, Madonna
Madonna Movie Madness
Keen to avoid an almost guaranteed flop with her second attempt at directing, Madonna has discussed the story of King Edward VIII's romance with US divorcée Wallis Simpson with members of the Royal family themselves. A source confirmed "The entire Royal Family were contacted and asked if they would like to meet Madonna and production staff - and many took up the opportunity." Fergie must be grinning from ear to ear, another sales opportunity awaits. Madonna directing? Good one, next thing she'll tell us she's going to do the soundtrack too... good Lord No!
Village Idiot for 3 Apr 2010, Madonna
Like Mother like Whore Daughter
After years of controversy Madonna hoped her daughter Lourdes, whom she calls Lola, wouldn't turn out like her, so instead she's helping her daughter with a new questionable teen clothing line. Madonna said "If anything, I wish she'd dress more conservatively. How's that for irony?" Names for the new clothing line include "Jail bait", "Not so much like a Virgin" and "Lolita". Why do I feel like there's going to be a house rigged with hidden camera's filming middle aged men acting creepy in the near future?
Village Idiot for 13 Mar 2010, Madonna
Madonna Mediating Marriages?
Twice divorced Madonna appeared on the new TV show 'The Marriage Ref' to dish out her views on marriage. The show requires celebrity guest to decide on on all important topics like whether or not a husband can put a stripper pole in the bedroom. Madonna as a guest? Is this show sponsored by a divorce attorney by any chance? I hear Madonna still received her usual appearance fee of a small African child but with built in child support, just in case.
Village Idiot for 27 Feb 2010, Madonna
Madonna's Music Man
The truth behind their relationship has finally been revealed with Madonna's toy boy, Jesus Luz, signing a record deal with Madonna's ex label, Warner. In order to secure more good loving Madonna had to give permission for her back catalogue of music to be used in adverts. The first single entitled "We Came From Light" will be released early May. You mean he's been waving his pecker around her all this time for fame and fortune - who would have guessed?
Village Idiot for 23 Jan 2010, Madonna
Madonna wants a baby Jesus
'The Sun' reports that Madonna has consulted with doctors about conceiving at the age of 51 with current boy toy Jesus aged 22. Madonna told friends that Jesus would be a "fantastic dad" and "I have endless love in my heart for another child." I reckon if Madonna and Jesus keep their current sex schedule of whenever-Jesus-is-drunk-enough/out-of-lunch-money, Madonna could give birth sometime late 2012. What do you know, the Mayans were right.
Village Idiot for 10 Oct 2009, Madonna
Madonna, Marriage & Murder
After appearing on the shoulders of six ice-hockey stars Madonna's interview with David Letterman, over some pizza, turned to a lighter subject - death by caboose carnage. Madonna told Letterman "Remarry? I think I'd rather get run over by a train." Needless to say her current boy toy, Jesus Luz, didn't take it too well and gave Madonna a piece of his mind, mind you he is a male model. Doesn't he know who pays for his juice box every lunch break? The important point to remember is that I have a toy train set that I'm willing to sacrifice in the name of science.
Village Idiot for 5 Sep 2009, Madonna
Sticky Patch on Tour
While in Bucharest on her 'Sticky & Sweet' European tour Madonna was booed when she raised her concerns on the treatment of Gypsies saying "It made me feel very sad." Later at a show in Bulgaria the Mad one collapsed twice on stage while singing "Holiday". I'm not saying there's any relation between Madonna's history of sabotaging group's by speaking out on their behalf (Kabbalah) and the current Gypsie like curse to shut her up before another angry mob is formed. Maybe she should steer clear of PR until her tour is over.
Village Idiot for 27 Jun 2009, Madonna
Never To Young to Learn
Only days after arriving back in the UK, Madonna has already planned Mercy's first holiday to the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem to introduce her to Kabbalah. Madonna has timed the holiday to coincide with the final stop on her Sticky And Sweet tour in Tel Aviv. A source said "Madonna wants to give Mercy enough time to settle in to her new home. By September she feels she will be ready to take the trip without danger of upheaval." What did I tell you about the whole cult thing? Stay away from the juice bottle.