Village Idiot for 18 Nov 2017, Gwyneth Paltrow
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By MingleMediaTVNetwork (Gwyneth Paltrow) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons
Gwyneth Paltrow as the Village Idiot

Gwyneth Losses When She Wins

Gwyneth Paltrow's infamous GOOP website has just won the "Rusty Razor" award for promoting pseudoscientific nonsense. The website famous for telling women to shove jade eggs up their vagina's and selling "bio frequency healing" stickers won this years award. And yet some poor sap out there is walking around, awkwardly I imagine, covered in stickers head to toe because who needs brains when you have money.

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More Gwyneth Paltrow News

Village Idiot for 14 Oct 2017, Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth Takes Her Health Hallucinations to TV

Gwyneth Paltrow wants to take her wacky "health" website to TV and create a Vice like TV series on health. Gwyneth said "I would be going into the field and talking to any number of doctors, scientists, civilians" All she wants to do is meet ordinary people to talk about health and sell them eggs for their vagina's. What's that you say? You have chronic pain? Have you tried a jade egg? This sounds like another Republican attempt to get rid of Obama Care.
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 2 Sep 2017, Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth Comes Clean on Her Relationships

Miss Paltrow has been linked to a variety of men, including Ben Affleck, Brad Pitt and Chris Martin, over the years and has finally come clean about those failed relationships. Gwyneth told Girlboss Radio "I'm actually a pretty good friend, and a good sister and a daughter and a mother, but I'm at my potentially most vulnerable and fucked up in the romantic slice of the pie." The good news is you can now buy Gwyneth's all new Romance Pies made with real Tasmanian platypus liver topped with Uzbekistan sheep spit whipped cream from GOOP for the price of a down payment on a house.
Really Dumb
Village Idiot for 12 Aug 2017, Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth is the Neighbour from Hell

Miss Paltrow has been annoying people for years with her crazy claims but now the annoyances are closer to home. Gwyneth has pissed off her neighbours with plans for a massive mansion that all her neighbours hate. A spokesperson said "She's created an uproar with neighbors on all three sides," going on to say "Michael and the other neighbors have tried to work with her, and they've gotten nowhere". If they're looking for ways to calm down I hear she has some jade eggs for sale.
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Village Idiot for 24 Jun 2017, Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth is Done with Acting

Gwyneth revealed that she's more interested in the world of business than acting. Gwyneth said "I'm not sure how I'll feel about acting going forward. I'm doing just a teensy little bit here and there when I have time, but I am loving running my business". Basically she thinks she's better at dispensing dodgy medical advice than acting, and she's right. Warning, inserting jade eggs into your vagina will not make you better at business but might induce hallucinations.
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