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By MingleMediaTVNetwork (Gwyneth Paltrow) [CC BY-SA 2.0 (http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/2.0)], via Wikimedia Commons
Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth Paltrow


28 September 1972, USA

"I'm really fucking good at my job, and people who are interesting and good know that. That's all that matters."
Stupid x 64

Gwyneth Paltrow Gossip and News - Page 3

Village Idiot for 19 Dec 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

Robbed and Proud

After her store was robbed Gwyneth referred to the incident as "Good Publicity". Gwyneth's mom said she phoned her daughter after the event which saw $200,000 in merchandise stolen but was told by her daughter "Oh, Mom, it's OK. It's good publicity." It's simple Business 101, always value PR over product.
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 21 Nov 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

Who Broke the Internet?

In an interview Miss Paltrow claimed she broke the internet when she and Chris Martin announced their "conscious uncoupling". Gwyneth told Fast Company "Even if you look back at the time my husband and I were separating and the philosophy of 'conscious uncoupling,' we broke the f*cking Internet,". Pretty sure she didn't break the internet or even a sweat when it came to her marriage. Sweating is for common folk, much like marriage.
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 31 Oct 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

The Breast Medical Advice Ever

Gwyneth took to GOOP to tell ladies to avoid bras because they can prevent lymph nodes from working and "toxins from being processed through them and flushed out of the body." along with raising the temperature of breasts which "alter hormone function and raise the risk of breast cancer" and of course when it comes to cellphones "your bra could absorb and intensify radiation" Normally I wouldn't go along with Miss Paltrow's quack science but I'll give this one a pass. Off with the bras.
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 3 Oct 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

GOOP Responds to Colbert

After Stephen Colbert made a parody about lifestyle brands Gwyneth fired back with a blog post. In it she welcomes Stephen to the club saying "It's about time someone brought a sausage or two to this clam bake" and then went on to her favourite topic genitals; saying "Everyone goes WILD for content about genitals, so we suggest you get ahead of the curve and write about a growing craze among men, anal bleaching," From vagina steaming to bleached butt holes, her lifestyle brand is unstoppable.
Stupid
Village Idiot for 1 Aug 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

Nothing Says Gangsta Pimping Like Gwyneth Paltrow

Gangsta Gwyneth has decided to start pimping clutches/purses with the names of famous Hip-Hop entertainers in sequins. The clutches with the names "Biggie", "Shady" and "Pac" will sell for $1,695 on her Goop site. You don't get more gangsta than walking around with a clutch sold on a health food and lifestyle website famous for its quirky actress namesake and her questionable alternative health treatments.
Stupid
Village Idiot for 18 Jul 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth Won't Keep Her Mouth Shut

Miss Paltrow recently wrote a blog post for her Goop site all about yawning telling a story about a yogi who encouraged it calling it "the bodies primary way to release and stretch". There you have it people, you are free to yawn to your hearts content while steaming your lady bits. Next week on Goop, Flatulence - A Conversation with your Bowels.
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 13 Jun 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

Couples Retreat will Probably End in a Death Match

Gwyneth Paltrow is apparently organizing a couples retreat for her and her new man Brad Falchuk along with ex-hubby Chris Martin and his new girlfriend, Jennifer Lawrence. That's right, Gwyneth wants to have the two new couples go on a double vacation after the "conscious uncoupling" debacle. A source said "Gwyneth recognizes it's time for Jen to meet the whole family, and she wants Chris to be there for Brad's first proper bonding experience with the children" Place your bets, my moneys on Jennifer Lawrence with her Hunger Games experience being the sole survivor.
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 23 May 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

Gwyneth's Beauty Routine

Miss Paltrow recently discussed her beauty routine which includes exercise, anything she wants to eat and sex. Gwyneth said "I'm not really a 'beauty person.' I believe, as cheesy as it sounds, in exercise, laughing, having sex, being yourself," She carried on saying "My food philosophy is: Nothing should be ruled out. I don't believe in saying, 'You're not allowed that.' If my kids want a Shirley Temple with the radioactive cherry in it, go for it, you know?" So that's how she loses weight, radioactive decay and... ejaculate?
Stupid
Village Idiot for 25 Apr 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

Food Challenge Cheater

After agreeing to live on $29 worth of food for a week as part of Mario Batali's NYC Food Bank Challenge it has been revealed that Gwyneth cheated. Rumours swirled that Miss Paltrow had cheated by enjoying a $80 meal at a celebrity event with Gwyneth herself later confessing saying "As I suspected, we only made it through about four days, when I personally broke and had some chicken and fresh vegetables (and in full transparency, half a bag of black licorice)" What happened to the good old days of ice bucket challenges? You know, the stuff reserved for celebrities.
Really Stupid
Village Idiot for 11 Apr 2015, Gwyneth Paltrow

Conscious Preliminary Coupling

With her "conscious uncoupling" well under way, and Chris Martin moving on to Jennifer Lawrence, Gwyneth decided it was time to go public with her new man, TV executive and Glee producer, Brad Falchuk. Gwyneth debuted her new beau at Robert Downey Jr.'s big birthday bash where they spent the night rubbing shoulders with other celebs. Glad to see she's moved on to a new work in progress. I'm sure they'll have plenty of fun on their date nights with rehydrated textured soy protein and ending with romantic salt water enema's.
Really Dumb